| Talk Show Appearances - 1996 | ||
| Today (NBC), Jan. 16 Charlie Rose, Jan. 16 Live with Regis & Kathie Lee, Jan. 17 Tonight Show, Jan. 23 Larry King Live, Mar. 15 Dennis Miller Live, Apr. 26 Tonight, Aug. 8 Clicking on the thumbnail images will cause larger versions of the images to open in a separate window.
Bryant Gumbel introduces Tracey by mentioning her "countless accolades" for her many characters and roles on the big and small screens, as well as on the Broadway stage. Now, after two cable specials, she's got a new series on HBO called Tracey Takes On... She says it's good to be back, then proceeds to feel Bryant's knees and the "beautiful material" of his suit pants. She also compliments him on the part in his hair, saying it's very 1928 (but Mrs. Gumbel does not approve...). She's plugging something worthwhile this time; it's her show, and she produces, writes, bosses everyone around -- she loves it! It's on HBO, where you can get away with more than on regular TV. She certainly feels freer than on her old Fox series. Bryant asks if her humor is tailored more for cable than for commercial TV. It probably is, she replies. There is no way she would ever do the standard sitcom -- staircase in background, couch in front, and two kids saying "Let's eat pizza!" She'd kill the kids by the second week, she says. Back to her new series: it's still a variety show, but it's not a pilot every week. There is going to be more week-to-week continuity with the characters so that people can get familiar with them. There's also a central theme each week -- an endless premise. Bryant summarizes the typical episode: it'll open with Tracey lying in bed, clothed (HBO didn't want her to be, but she insisted) and semi-dreaming words related to the week's theme; then she wakes up and says "yeah, I'll take that on," and then we see several vignettes about that week's topic. Tracey takes over here: she created several characters who could counteract each other's viewpoints, providing a broad spectrum of opinion. If you don't see them in a full-blown sketch, you'll likely see them in a monologue. Either way, most will appear each week so you get some continuity, like the way Jackie Gleason used to do it on his shows. She did 22 characters in 10 episodes, she says [though I only counted 20 -- RR]. Bryant recalls reading where she had said she likes acting in disguise because she gains confidence when she doesn't look or sound like herself. She agrees with this. Bryant then asks "You don't like yourself?" Tracey warns Bryant not to do that psychological stuff on her; in her words, "I'm just a chirpy Cockney with a big nose!... I don't want to be me." They then talk about some of the disguises, including the 70-year-old Asian woman [Mrs. Noh Nang Ning, though she is not named here -- RR]. The makeup for her was very elaborate and rather claustrophobic at times. We then see a clip of several sketches and short bits from the Romance episode. You'll see Fern quite frequently, Tracey says, for she's the kind of person who'll have an opinion on just about everything. That sort of woman is on her way into the city now, buying tickets for the matinee, and they'll sit in the 3rd row when she's doing a show, and they'll go "Darling, speak up, we can't hear you!" So you'll see Fern frequently, and you'll see Chic frequently, and you'll see her getting out of bed in the morning looking like Ursula Andress from Dr. No -- "what more could you want?" The conversation turns back to Chic: Tracey asks Bryant "You've been in that guy's cab, right?", and he agrees. She riffs as Chic for a short time, but the segment ends abruptly when it bumps against the local news slot.
Charlie introduces Tracey by describing some of her career highlights: stage school at 12, dancing in Berlin at 16, American TV in 1987, several films, and now a new series on HBO. He asks her to compare TTO with her old Fox series. The new one is not like a pilot every week, she says. Her old series was exhausting; the characters didn't repeat from one week to the next. This new series has a central theme and a great premise. There were two specials that tried out the concept, one on New York and another on the English class system. She and husband Allan are co-executive producers; they're past the point in their marriage where they avoided working together for fear that would split them apart. She wants to know the guy she's picking on regularly. He's got other activities going on; there's no concern about an "A Star Is Born" walking-into-the-ocean incident. He likes raising money, doing the contracts and all that; usually, everyone wants to be creative. They have been compared by the British press to Jane Fonda and Ted Turner. She tells how one paper described them: they called her "unphotogenic but has the gloss of money" and said Allan "had the face of a friendly King Edward potato." Allan objected to "friendly", she adds. They've made good money for two British working-class people. The UK's biggest export is envy, she says. They both left school at 14, so it appears they've done well for themselves. Charlie asks Tracey if she'll make America her home. She's been here for 12 years, she responds. She describes herself as an international performer, a la Topo Gigio, Sacha Distel, Charles Aznavour, Nana Mouskouri, etc. She's got both European and American sensibilities; she has the sarcastic, self-deprecating outlook of the British but also has this optimistic "I can be anyone!" sensibility of the Americans. She points out that her daughter Mabel can become president someday but would not be able to go out with Prince William. Mabel's begun to figure out the class system while attending school in England and has tried to figure out where she would be -- she's said "Mommy, you're common but Daddy's really common." We then see a lengthy clip from the Charity episode, in which Fern and Harry are being interviewed about the benefit. Charlie then asks Tracey about the other characters. First, Trevor. It's hard to get all of the proportions right, head to shoulders to hip, the fake willy, the special shoes, etc. He's based on air stewards she's known for years, she says. Next, Chris Warner. This is the lover of golfer Midge Dexter who chafes at being unable to publicly display her love. This originated from the many "dykes on spikes" comments of bigoted golf commentators ("get more tolerant, guys!"). The sketch is a very poignant piece, she says. And if she was going to French kiss a woman on national TV, it'd have to be Julie Kavner. They work quite well together, and the same goes for Michael Tucker. Next, Janie Pillsworth. Janie, explains Tracey, is an amalgamation of the top British women magazine editors who have come over to New York, such as Tina Brown and Liz Tilberis. She then gives the back story on Janie, how she was from a humble background before going off to boarding school in England and acquiring upper-class habits and attitudes and disowning her parents. We then see a clip of Janie from the Charity episode. The characters will appear weekly, she explains; there is a broad spectrum from which to choose, where Janie will be counteracted by Fern, Chic by Hope, etc. She can say one thing as Ruby Romaine (and proceeds to do so), then say another as Hope. Charlie recalls reading a story about Tracey that when she first came to the US, James Brooks ("my mentor", she says) gave her a big collection of movies, tapes, TV episodes, etc. so that she could study the great comedians. Yes, it's true, she explains; this was when she was pregnant with daughter Mabel and her Fox series was being developed. She had seen quite a bit of good American TV back in England; she was familiar with Mary Tyler Moore and Rhoda, etc. Now she was seeing some of the stuff she had not seen back home, such as Imogene Coca on Your Show of Shows, Ernie Kovacs, etc. She was getting a good grounding in American culture, she says; after all, you can't get off the plane and imitate right away, you've got to get into the culture. And what are her impressions of America comedy? It seems kinder to her; we Americans do laugh at ourselves but take longer to do so, nor is there as much sarcasm and pessimism. Also, there is the strength of American women in comedy. British comedy of the 1960s and early 1970s, when she was growing up, was pretty class-ridden. Now Monty Python was terrific, she says, but in general it was male-oriented upper-class or middle-class university humor. The Pythons had no idea how to work with women. Compare this to America, where there always have been strong female characters. The UK didn't even have a national female newscaster until the '70s! She praises the great writing of American comedy, such as Cheers, Taxi and Mary Tyler Moore; there is no UK equivalent for being that good for that long, year over year. She mentions there being only 10 episodes of Fawlty Towers. Charlie says that was because 10 was as many as the creators thought they could do at that level of quality, but Tracey argues that perhaps they could have done more at equal quality had the US team system been used. In Britain, you've got one guy going off to Brighton with his cat, being miserable and lonely, then writing a TV show episode. In the US, you've got the teamwork, the younger writers learning from the old pros, developing good characters and making them very interesting. Charlie observes that many of the leading prime-time shows are led by former stand-up comedians. Tracey says she's never done stand-up and cannot do stand-up; she's a character actress. The comics are good, but they seem to have difficulty acting with the other people in their shows at times; they're too used to working solo. This does not apply to Roseanne, though; she admires her. Roseanne is showing in the UK, Tracey says. When Charlie asks if Baywatch is still big in Europe, she answers that indeed it is. When the weather is freezing in Europe, it's natural to want to see blondes with big boobs bobbing on the beach. Asked about her other projects, she replies that her new series has been all consuming, but she did work on a Woody Allen film last November [it's not clear whether she meant Bullets Over Broadway or her excised part in Everyone Says I Love You -- RR]. She loves working with Woody; he casts the right person for the part. She gets upset by all of the casting that's based on how beautiful you are or how hot you are at the box office. Woody lets you improvise, she says; he does great movies for women. Jim Brooks understands women, too, she says. Charlie then asks about the Simpsons. She explains how they started off on her show and then became the phenomenon that they are ("I breast-fed those little devils"). She describes the lawsuit she filed in the early '90s, how her attorney thought she should have a percentage of the merchandising. She also cites it, tongue-in-cheek, as a career move ("come to America, what do you do? Get into the legal system.") The suit was decided against her, but it was no big deal. And on that note, the interview ends. 3. Live with Regis & Kathie Lee, Jan. 17
Joe Piscopo is filling in for Regis today. After Tracey is introduced, Kathie Lee says to her that she hardly got to the show this morning because she was watching the preview tape of TTO Charity. Tracey explains that Fern would be a natural one to throw a big benefit, but as we see in the sketch, it all becomes about her. Then she (Tracey) talks about her graying husband Allan waiting in the wings; he has just had a lot of dental work done and is not having a lot of fun at the moment. Kathie Lee reminds Tracey of a quote she made the last time she was on, something about their children going to see the psychiatrist together and being on a show called "Children with famous parents who talk about them too much on TV." Cody was home with the chicken pox that day and saw it, says Kathie Lee; he was so thrilled that it had a name! After a brief discussion of how son Johnny has outgrown his "remote control willy" stage, a discussion that Joe was a bit uncomfortable with, the discussion turns to TTO. It has a good premise, says Tracey, for you can take on anything, such as the wives of Andrew Lloyd Webber. Kathie Lee then asks "why does everybody forgive you so easily?" Tracey mentions her broad spectrum of characters, such as the gay airline steward [Trevor] one minute and the liberal college student from the East Coast [Hope] the next, and they tend to counteract one another. We then are treated to a bit of a riff as Chic ("Hey Kathie Lee, you sexy lady") as they go into a break. After the break, Kathie Lee says they were discussing women getting power in the industry. Joe says that women got it all, to which Tracey responds in jest "Shut up, Joe, we're talking!" She says that she spent two years kissing HBO executive Michael Fuchs' butt to get the desired level of control for TTO, and now he's gone! Joe says that his characterizations have relied heavily on impressions, whereas Tracey's have been original. He asks if she uses prosthetics. Yes, she does, and they are murder! It takes 6 hours to get into makeup as Mrs. Noh Nang Ning, and then she was doing sketches and monologues for 12 hours straight, and at the end of that time, she panicked. Joe remembers the prosthetics he used to use on Saturday Night Live and how they were applied with superglue or something similar. Tracey points out that those were not worn for as nearly as long, though. Your skin can't breathe when they're on. Asked about her favorite character, she says she doesn't have one, that she likes switching from one to another. However, she does like Fern, her Long Island Jew (New York Jew equals funny). This leads into a clip from the Romance episode of TTO, where Fern is with Harry in the hospital. Kathie Lee says that was one of the few clips they were able to show on the air. Tracey praises Michael Tucker as Harry; not many actors would be willing to put on the balding headpiece with the bad comb-over, the knee socks, etc. And on that note, the segment ends.
Jay Leno introduces Tracey by citing her 5 Emmy wins, "and she's still a kid". She comes out to the strains of "Rule Britannia" and is surprised that the audience is standing for her as if she's royalty. The set has really changed since her last visit, she notices. The audience is much closer now than it used to be; you can smell the aftershave and cheap hair color now. When she was on the show for the first time 12 years ago, back in 1984, she remembered those multicolored curtains; now, she wonders if they are folded up in a box somewhere. "I think so," says Jay, upon which she imagines them in a box in the NBC closet, and Jay's labeled the box with its contents. She comments on some risqué bits that have appeared on the show recently, calling Jay "impish" for doing them. He then says that she looks better now than she did 14 years ago. Liposuction does wonders, she says. No, just kidding. She's had two children, which has taken away the baby fat, and she does think she looks better as she gets older. She's remembering the blond friends of hers that were beating her for jobs at 16, and she's glad she's a brunette now! We hear the brunettes in the audience agreeing with her. Those blonds are now probably brunettes as well, quips Jay. Asked about where she's currently living, she says she's in L.A. now. She tells a story about daughter Mabel, who, while attending school in England, found herself deciding what class she would be. How old is she now, asks Jay; menopausal, but she's on hormonal replacement therapy, so she's happier now -- just kidding! Now Tracey has vowed not to talk about Mabel any more -- she has a vision of her appearing with Cody Gifford on a show called "Kids Whose Mothers Talk About Them Too Much On TV." It's gotten to the point where if they are out with her young friends, she (Tracey) now has to sit at another table -- the "embarrassing mother" stage (are your bosoms growing yet? Shut up!). Jay says he imagined Mabel to be like Saffron on Absolutely Fabulous; Tracey says that her friend Mandy refers to the two of them as the Ab Fabs, looking for ant-aging rejuvenating cream at airports. Mabel's fashion sense? She has her own style; she's very much an individual. The discussion then turns to class consciousness and the class system in England. Tracey tells the story of how Mabel had figured out that Mommy was common but Daddy was really common. But she is an American taxpayer, in case anyone from the IRS is watching; she's part of the system. Back in England, she runs in the park and frequently sees Princess Diana in her car; indeed, Diana almost ran over her one day (sorry!). You can't say "come on over for some tea and Falcon Crest", but she does like the princess. She stood up and said "there's something wrong here" (the audience cheers). Here's her plan for Diana: move to Palm Beach, have her own TV show, date her own trainer, who's a big hunky guy -- why live in a big goldfish bowl in London? Come over here! She may not be a rocket scientist, but she's a nice enough person. Then Tracey says if she talks about royalty on TV again, they'll put her in the Tower when she returns to Britain. There were some MP's who really wanted to do that, she says. As for Fergie, who's deeply in debt, she'll have to do another photo spread with the kids in Hello! magazine to get out of it. Interviewer becomes interviewee as Tracey asks Jay if he were impressed with Fergie when they met. All she needs to do to get out of debt is to take a few topless photos (snap, snap) and sell them off. On to Tracey's new series TTO: Jay is very impressed with it and with the 5-page ad in that week's People magazine. It's good fun, she says. She wanted to do another variety series but not the same thing as her old Fox series, which was so exhausting -- a pilot every week. So this new series will have a theme with regular recurring characters. We see a few stills of the characters as Jay asks about them. The first is Mrs. Noh Nang Ning, the donut shop owner. This is based on a real donut shop owner from whom she buys donuts when she's writing. This woman is very funny and has a comment on everything. The makeup, though, is murder; it's like being buried alive. Mrs. Noh is an indeterminate Asian, in these politically correct days -- "heaven forbid I should get into trouble!" Then she does the antithesis of her: Chic, the Middle Eastern cabbie. We've all been in this guy's cab, she says, then proceeds to riff a little as Chic. Her son Johnny was disturbed to see Mommy covered in hair and wearing a fake penis while on the set. "Can you say 'penis' on NBC?" wonders Tracey (you can, for it wasn't bleeped out). She's on HBO now, and she can do anything! The execs at HBO asked if she could show her breasts more in this episode [actually, none of the bare breasts in the series were hers -- RR]. Jay asks about Fern, and Tracey replies that she's still doing her. Commenting on the still that's up on the screen, she says Fern is thinking "I have such gas." Julie Kavner is back with her, she goes on to say; the audience greets this news with cheers. The series debuts tomorrow on HBO, says Jay as the segment wraps up, but Tracey tells us to watch because you'll get to see two women French-kissing.
This interview is coming from Los Angeles. As the segment begins, Larry announces that they are moving from the ridiculous to the sublime, or vice versa. There are two more episodes of TTO left in the current season, he says, and in them, Tracey plays every known individual on the face of the planet." But right now, as a prelude to that weekend's big heavyweight fight between Mike Tyson and Frank Bruno, Larry asks Tracey for a new character: Dutch Ullman, boxing promoter. She obliges with a few comments -- she wants to be one of the women in front going "Kill him, kill him!" She's supporting her fellow countryman Bruno, whom she describes as a lovely and charming boy. The match had to be delayed because Frank was appearing in a Christmas pantomime engagement in Lincoln (imagine how Don King would react to that!). And she gives a message to the 5000 or so Britons in Las Vegas for the fight: "behave yourselves, lads;" don't behave like typical English soccer fans. She wishes she could go to the fight, but it's not an HBO-produced fight (they take her to those). So she'll be busy writing the second season of TTO. She admits to liking a bit of boxing; Larry is a bit surprised by that. Asked by him to describe herself at school, she says she was the wisecracking kid at the back of the class who could impersonate all of the teachers. That was how she got attention. She put that skill to use in at least one end-of-term school show. Larry asks if being funny takes away from a woman's femininity. Possibly, replies Tracey; she was the one that couldn't stop cracking jokes on dates. He says she's very pretty; she says she's all right. Her first boyfriend said she was a bit of a dog in the morning, but once she got her makeup on she was all right. She disagrees with that somewhat; put on some lipstick and some designer clothes, and she's presentable. She's got the sheen of money, she says. Larry asks Tracey if she's married; she replies that she's been married for 13 years. She wanted to marry a Michael Caine type of Cockney, one that used to go out with a lot of Playboy Bunnies but wants to settle down with a smart brunette, and she found such a man in her husband Allan. Larry asks how old Allan is; he's 50. He asks how old she is; she's 36. "Tracey!" says Larry, slightly disapprovingly. But he moves from that subject when he asks her to describe her new series. She wanted to do a variety show again, she explains; she did not and does not want to do a one-character show, no sitcom nanny with two kids in her charge, couch in the foreground and stairs in the back. The show will have a central subject each week, making it easier to write. Her old Fox series (TTUS) was very tiring to do; it was like doing a pilot every week. Larry mentions royalty; Tracey says she's always wanted to impersonate a member of the royal family. She describes the sketch in which she played Her Royal Highness; playing multiple characters in one sketch is tough, she admits. In this week's episode [Health], she does four in one sketch; she doesn't want to do too much of that. The hardest thing about the characters: the makeup jobs, such as the one on Mrs. Noh. She compares that makeup job to being buried alive. Larry asks if she has to become that character while she's made up as him/her. She says she does because it saves time and makes it easier for her to relate to the crew as that character. Some crewmembers think that the characters actually exist, she says, citing Rayleen Gibson as an example. Larry observes that she must not have the smartest crew in the world. He then asks her if being multitalented like she is is a hindrance, as in "Tracey is so good, we don't know what to do with her?" Yes, she admits, that has been a problem in movies. But she's not a movie snob; she loves the immediacy of TV. Larry mentions Dana Carvey, who will be a guest next week, and calls him "a male you." She likes his show, even though the reviews were grim. Then she says that she doesn't impersonate known people. It's just her preference to create new characters, such as HRH. That royal is a conglomeration: the Queen's voice, Princess Margaret's personality, the Duchess of Kent's hats, and Princess Anne's teeth. Anyone can get up and impersonate someone, she says; doing Hillary Clinton does not interest her. Larry thinks that Dana and she would make an interesting pair. She says her hero is Peter Sellers, calling Dr. Strangelove brilliant. But she never got to meet him, alas. As they go to a break, we see an excerpt from TTO Scandal featuring Linda Granger. TTO has been renewed for another season of 15 episodes. Where are they shot? Everywhere, says Tracey; Vegas this year for sure. Then she and Larry discuss some possible topics for future episodes -- infomercials, Psychic Friends Network (her kind of TV), daytime talk, trials (she could be all 12 jurors). Larry points out that, because of her multiple roles, she should be paid a lot of money. Changing the subject: she and her family live in both L.A. and London; she tries to be transatlantic. There are more parks in London, she says; it's more civilized, and people hate you if you're in showbiz. In America, if you're in showbiz, you're royalty, but in England, she's trash! It's the snob thing, the class thing, and it still irritates her to this day. She describes the British press as vile, unlike the American press, where doing an interview is generally a pleasant experience. Poor Diana, living in a goldfish bowl, having to put up with guys who want to take a picture so that they can sell it and put their children through school. Tracey admires her for standing up and saying "there's something wrong here." Larry asks Tracey about Charles, and she calls him totally out of touch with reality -- they all are, she says. The monarchy should be scaled back, more along the lines of the Scandinavian royal lines. Keep them on the coins and let them greet people at the airports, but there's no need to spend big money on the Big Royal Machine. The first call is from Colorado, and the caller asks Tracey who is her favorite character. She likes them all, but she specifically mentions Ruby Romaine. The next call is from Louisiana, and the caller asks if it was difficult for her to adjust to the American comedy scene. British comedy is different, she says; they are more cynical and cruel and tend to laugh at themselves more readily. However, she loves the American comedy scene because we Americans like funny women. English humor has been male-oriented -- chaps on the BBC who went to university, etc. Here, we've got Carol Burnett, Lucille Ball, Mary Tyler Moore. Larry asks Tracey if there is a famous British comedienne besides herself. There are now, she says, specifically mentioning French and Saunders. Not Beatrice Lillie, though, for she was born in Canada. It's true, Tracey says; she read it in a book. It looks like she's taught Larry something; "it's a miracle!" she says. Asked about the Simpsons, she says she's not bitter about their success, though she should have taken that 30 seconds in the middle of the show. She's not bitter about losing a lawsuit for some of the merchandising proceeds from the show. Larry asks how she got the idea to bring them into the show. It wasn't her idea, she says, but Jim Brooks's. And as they go to another break, Tracey plays with one of Larry's suspender straps, and we see a clip from TTO Health. Larry asks Tracey which comes first, the makeup or the voice. It's a bit of both, she replies; the characters are always based on someone she knows, even the lover of the lesbian golfer. She riffs for a bit on Trevor and Chic. She'll never be stumped with a character, she says; she recalls the advice Jim Brooks gave her: if you want to do somebody from Queens, call up a librarian from Queens and keep her talking until you get the voice. Would she ever like to do a show as herself, such as doing something like Larry's show? No, not really [but she changed her mind in 2001 with VPL -- RR]. The next caller is from Virginia: has she ever been talked out of doing a character? No, she says; she gets around that by doing everybody and anybody. Has she done blacks? Yes, several years ago [referring to TTUS; Sheneesha would not appear for another season on TTO -- RR]. With enough energy and honesty and good spirit, she says there's nothing you can't do. And after this coming break, Larry asks her to demonstrate that by coming up with a new talk show host. We now meet the newest daytime talk show host, Leandra, who is very Californian. She's based on a former teacher of Mabel's, says Tracey, that had no sense of humor. She then complains about the daytime talk shows and how you see the same people moving from one show to the next. The freak shows aren't at the circus anymore, they're on TV! The daytime talk show is now starting to appear in England, and it's funny to see British people attempting to lose their inhibitions. Over here, where we Americans are so free, it doesn't mean anything to reveal your inner self. Will she go back to England soon? Yes, for Wimbledon, she says. Larry then comments that she's turning a bit orange ("too much carrot juice"). This was the first time they had met in person, it turns out; all the previous times, they had spoken via satellite. And so, with a "goodnight, Bugs" from Larry, a "go, Frank Bruno" from Tracey, and an announcement about a tribute to George Burns the next night, the interview ends. 6. Dennis Miller Live, Apr. 26
Dennis wraps up his rant on royalty (and the British royal family in particular) by saying that the only purpose Britain serves nowadays is to provide America with fashion, rock stars and Emma Thompson, among other things. After he concludes, he says he left out one person from that list: Tracey, who's tonight's guest. She comes out and takes mock umbrage at his remark, then recites a couple of lines from "God Save The Queen" by the Sex Pistols. After the applause dies down, she tells Dennis that she was listening to his rant backstage, agreeing with most everything he said, until he got to the end (it was for comedic purposes, he explains). Her mother would have been offended by some of the things he said. She goes on to say that she was questioning the status and position of the royal family over 10 years ago, but she got into trouble for her remarks. There were some MP's who wanted to put her in the Tower! But then again, if the monarchy vanished, there wouldn't be much to talk about. When Charles I was deposed and Cromwell took over, it was dull, so everyone supported the Restoration of Charles II. She recommends cutting back on what the royals receive from the treasury; after all, they don't need 8 houses and 2000 homosexuals looking after them. She then pulls out a photo from 1984 of her meeting Princess Diana. In the background is a man who's just met her, and you can tell that his heart's racing, he's started to sweat, and he's got an erection (or should that be scepter?). Diana is the most sympathetic of the royals, says Tracey; she had to be terribly brave to raise questions about her treatment. If she (Tracey) could advise Diana, she'd advise her to go to Palm Beach, find a black trainer, and get laid. But that's not possible, for she can't leave Britain because of the children (Princes William and Harry). The first phone caller asks Tracey which member of the royal family she identifies with the most. She says Diana, because she's the only one who does anything. She then lays into Princess Michael of Kent, who once complained to Barbara Walters about some of the charity work being boring. Show some gratitude, she says! The next caller is from Paris, Texas, and she fails to get Dennis's Harry Dean Stanton reference. She wonders why we obsess so over Diana's thighs, her cellulite, etc. Tracey then recalls the incident where a guy had rigged a hidden camera over Diana's Nautilus machine -- ooh! On this note, the segment ends, as Dennis leaves to do the news. Comment: It's rather poignant to watch this appearance, knowing that Diana would die 14 months afterwards. In a 1998 radio interview, Tracey said that she'd sent Diana a copy of the Royalty episode of TTO, which contained a sketch in which Sydney Kross offered to represent Diana in her divorce from Charles. She enjoyed the tape, said Tracey.
After Tracey comes out on stage, Jay congratulates her on her latest Emmy nomination. Kevin Costner, who was interviewed first, remains on the set, prompting her to says "Look at me, girls, I'm with two hunky guys!" She compares the resulting screams to Beatlemania. Jay quips that the screams are being split 50-50. Kevin is promoting his golf-themed film Tin Cup, prompting Tracey to say that she hates golf. She's a golf widow; her husband Allan will play any chance he can get. She mentions videotaping his swing and having to dress like a Yuppie whenever they try and join a golf club. She's looking at Kevin while venting, prompting him to ask "Are you yelling at me?" No, she says, it's nothing personal. Things were going great 10 minutes ago, says Kevin. She comments on girls teeing off at 10 and having to wear hot pink culottes -- it's like a segregated sport, she complains. Kevin says her husband is feeding her a line if he says you've got to do that; no, she responds, this came from one of the women in the club. However, she does like Jack Nicklaus. In fact, she arranged for Jack to call her husband on his 50th birthday. He was quite surprised by the call, she says; in fact, he was stammering and carrying on so much, she thought he was going to have a heart attack. The topic turns to the Olympics, and Tracey says "don't get me started." She was looking for a John Tesh piñata for her son's birthday party, she says, proceeding to question his qualifications to call the gymnastics competition. She then complains about NBC choosing to show Kerry Strug unwrapping her bandages than show a Romanian competitor. You never saw when the poor old British women won a bronze medal, she complains. And what are the gymnasts doing to their ovaries? With all the bends and moves they're making, no wonder they're on the verge of tears. You can't do that to your pelvic region and hope to bear children, she says. Anyway... the conversation turns to birthday parties and children's entertainers. It's hard to get good ones, she says, for you never know what sort of loony you're going to get. When Mabel was 2, they hired a clown that was coked out of his brains. He'd come out of the toilet completely wired going "Hi (sniff) where are the kids (sniff)?" He was doing some Ghostbusters shtick (keep in mind that it had been 4 years since it had been out) -- "who you gonna call? (sniff) Who you gonna call? (sniff)", and the kids were going "We don't know!" She recalls hiring a Snow White one time who turned up looking like she'd been raped by the Seven Dwarfs. Fortunately, her son's party turned out well. They had a Hispanic Batman, who was wearing sweat shields to keep the nylon uniform from staining. If you drive from the Valley wearing a nylon suit, says Tracey, it's bloody hot! She then asks "I'm not an embarrassing mother, am I, Kevin?" He never answers [good thing she never asked her daughter -- RR]. The topic turns to the second season of TTO. It'll be all-new this January, says Tracey; in fact, filming begins next Monday, meaning it's time to be encased in rubber for the next three months. Jay asks how long it takes to be made up as one of her characters, and she answers by talking about Ruby Romaine, the North Hollywood resident who would keep her Christmas tree up throughout the year because it's company (she says this as Ruby). She mentions the enormous bird seed breasts that she puts on as Ruby, but they're new for this year because the old ones were eaten by rats while in storage. She likes total immersion in her characters; she wants to become them. And as Jay wishes her good luck at the Emmys and her new season of TTO, the interview ends. Prepared by Roger Reini |
